dam kevin .
he can't come to school for a week .
really feel empty on friday when i walked into th class.
its really so wierd.
i have been so used to see him everyday till ..
i feel really so ...
darn.
i just hope he is feeling alright .
it used to be chunyong..
now its him.
haiz.
SOMEMORE HE IS MY CLOSEST FRIEND IN 3/6 ._.
i think its because we play too much together .
hahas .
i'll miss you , bro .
i'm waiting for you .
come back real soon .
(:


days are terrible .
my rank of my new lars have finally went back from beginner to rogue.
finally my green rank is back .
what a terrible amount of time i suffered.
how great is that setback .
i don't know .
how much words have people said to hurt me .
i don't know either .
all i know is that .
i have gotten back to sq one now.



i would have give up th world just for you ,
i love you .

♥ 9:58 PM

alright last post before going do my portfolio !
have been chased badly by mr wee.
atrocious results !
haiz dont mention them lerhs.
faster finish portfolio means more sleep (:
oo today school is also so tiring.
actually everyday is.
haha {:
today npcc is so fun too !
sec 2s have to train for 2nd class drill badge
so i and kevin have to guide them along .
found out that they don't know much about sizing commands especially.
nvm everyone work hard ^^
asked them if they are tired and they say ; yes !
loll !
i shouldn't ask them that as their senior but ..
they seemed pitiful.
but ..
cant blame anything .
no one wished H1N1 would come ..
and principal stopped cca so the sec2s got many things to do.
Sec2 com work hard ! (:
*off to my coffee break :D
no larhs .
i'm there too (;
thanks dear for waiting for me (:
wanted to buy something ..
but she said too late...
so ..
tomorrow den buy ^^
LOL.
wondering should i ,
or should i not .
hmm ..
hmmm ...
hmmmm ....
still no idea oO.
k larhs !
i must work hard in th month before EOY .
time seemed to be running out for me.
but its ok .
i will chase time with my own means .
smile , sweetheart .
iloveyou ♥

{:

♥ 8:03 AM

hmm.i think i post first before studying biology bahs.
planning to study 2 hours straight.
:D
i know i'm hardworking (:
hmm today amaths is horrible !
not worth mentioning :D
lalala ~
fast forward to after school.
have tution today but i postponed it :D
slacked in school
and went home.
haiz.

everything excluding love (:
i suddenly miss ..
peiyi,
kevin,
joey,
chunyong,
junzhi,
anthony,
kianwee,
royce,
xiangqi,
erin,
serene,
syariff,
syakir,
sekeng,
felix,
junzhi
and such many more.
what happened to us?
what happened to th times we passed through webs of trouble as one,
what happened to th teamwork we have in going against teachers,
what happened to th joy we have?
everyone's so stressed up,
maybe we could have an outing like th past we do frequently ? (:
maybe all is th past and now is th future.
i know th first and last war of th class is still on.
i know all this will only end at th end of our 4th year .
i know.
let everything go k guys?
i can feel your tears and pain.
but thats th past isn't it?
hahas.
i know everyone could do it together .
but still.
i love my dear most ^^

how dark can it be with you beside me ? :D

♥ 6:33 AM

time passes really suddenly fast.
its has been 6 years since th incident.
i still cant forget that moment.
i know you are beside me.
i haven't seen you for 6 years.
but i know you have always been at my side.
i still held our promise 6 years ago.
although i am still small at that time.
that dosen't give me an escuse not to hold on to my promise.
i wonder how are you living in th other world.
....


today school is ok.
chemistry paper is terrible.
today is physics paper so i went to th library.
slacked there as usual and draw afew random minions
tomorrow is Amaths.
lolls.
nevermind larhs i try ..
after school...
talk alot things with bro.
idk why.
i really don't know.
it must have been we have been together and went through so much things together ,
till i can now easily feel how you are feeling.
th feelings in you is terrible.
it reminds me of th past.
the past that i would never want to go back.
you told me to treasure everything i had now.
i will rather lose everything den to lose something.
i find out we are from th same blood.
we are willing to go against th world just for th thing we love.
but why do guys with this kind of blood always suffer so much from young?
i dont know.
we had all went pass through so much in primary school.
its th same even in secoondary school.
th pain and agony that we had experienced.
i hope it will all be over soon .
i know you just had a simple wish ,
just like i do .
i know you are bleeding in your heart ,
i know you are sad deep in you.
so do i.
i feel a monster lurking deep in my heart.
been there ever since i started to become quiet.
at times i really don't feel like talking.
don't feel like seeing.
don't feel like thinking about anything.
just like you ,
that leds us to being brothers .
bro ,
you will let me down if you give up .
i will be your pillar you can lie on if you ever fall .
since you gently carried me ever since th past knocked me down .
and bring me to hope .
i will do th same .
i can't be sure of certain things ..
th way i talk is not motivating or anything.
but just come from th real feelings of my heart .
work hard .
i know we can overcome th demons in our hearts together .
right ?
i know its painful .
i know .
i really know.
but ..
if we never do it ..
we can never get rid of our sadness .
that leds us to become brothers of eternal hell .
hmm you know what i'm saying , bro.
i'll help you rise back to your feet .


ohmy .
dear ,
you are always in my heart .


kaichong.

♥ 7:31 AM

finally back home .
for some reasons i am not home ^^
alright .
tomorrow history lerhs i study half-half .
i think i still can make it bahhs ^^
must look at th bright side (:
when th english teacher want to see th 5 posts ._.
i thk my current posts flooding my 5 days-posts already larhs !
today ,
finally dumb become my dear ! (:
sounds like some fairytales but it isn't .
lolll !
aiyahhs i suddenly got alot mood to study.
but its late .
dear sleep lerhs .
k so left me in a dark room.
which is my room and i lazy on lights ._.
so ...
i want to say .
sweetdreams , dear {:
* although i know you are sleeping like a log now [:

♥ 9:01 AM

today is a fun day ..
except my gastrics clinging to me th whole day ,
but i still can bear .
i can.
today go play basketball one match only ..
lolls.
went home then .
:D


i am ok ,
i have trusst in you .
really .
just because i love you .
only that reason .
nothing else .

♥ 6:14 AM

you said you don't like me to be with other girls ,
you mean i like it when you are with other guys ?
every minute bites into me .
i feel like talking with you .
everytime i turned in front ,
you are talking happily with others lerhs .
suan lerh bahs .
first you have different feelings ,
next this .
i also don't know what i should do lerh .

♥ 2:04 AM

sorry but everyone who pass by this blog please sms me your number and your name thanks lots .

kaichong ,
i still love you.

♥ 4:16 AM

please add mysticlurve@hotmail.com in your msn as that will be the msn i will be using from now on .
thanks for your time (:

♥ 6:13 AM

[ Day 5 ]
My head hurts even more than on thrusday so i didn't went to school ,
missed the NDP haha nevermind :D
went to see doctor in the morning ..
waited for a long time because there many more people like me in the clinic .
a kid was singing michael jackson's billie jean and doing moonwalk .
everyone was laughing like ..
so small yet he can do moonwalk?
doctor gives me medicine and off i go ..
and eat lunch ._.
when home and played computer because there is really nothing to do .
went to hear Adam lambert's songs .
so what if he is a gay ?
there is nothing wrong being a gay .
he is born to be .
it is not something he wished for .
what matters is his voice .
which make people fall in love with it .
Adam tried so hard to make people become mesmorised with his vocal.
it is seriously very beautiful .
his emotions can really be felt when he sings .
this is genuine singing .
those in fact overshadowed the fact he is a gay .
at night i went to th arcade to see if there is anyone there .
lols everyone is there :D
make me feels so happy idk why .
i mean .
talking to my friends there really make me feels like..
i'm back in my home .
even th stupidest jess would wait for me .
haha thanks larh
dont say i always bad to you ._.
sometimes some people really important in my life .
like ping , liang , esmond and alex ...
idk how explain .
the friendship can't be describe by mere words .
sometimes we quarrel and bicker ..
stayed overnight at ea other house ..
disturb ea other ..
go out with ea other ..
how can i ever experience such a ... feeling that even couldn't be describe .
it's so better going with you guys den pretty girls .
( jess i not referring to going out with you not good hor ._. )
i hope .
we will be eternal friends .
even if i die .
serious (:

i swear .
kaichong (:

♥ 10:53 PM

[day 4]
should i say i am happy or sad .
i can't go to school today ,
my gastrics got worse till i can't even get out of bed
and walk to the toilet to wash up even .
so i need to bear with the pain and close my eyes .
i tried .
to fall asleep
but only succeed after a long time .
when i wake up ,
hahas many people sms me asking why din't i go to school.
thanks everyone
and Jess ..
you came to my house just now ? ._.
how you know i got gastrics before even i tell you -.-
thats stupid ._.
spent the whole morning using the com obviously .
skipped the 2 periods of maths i abit worry idk why also .
lollls.
everyone is still in school now ...
but its ending soon in 15 mins .
haha .
but ...
about tomorrow NDP ...
i dont know .
i feel so LOL about it .
can't explain why .
its so ... WIERD .
LOLLL.
just now i drew quite a bit and listen to MJ and other artistes songs .
wonder if i spell that right oO .
alright :D
have tution later at 5 ...
i now still feel abit giddy ...
giddy still have go tution ._.
have to grumble liao LOL.
:D at night need chiong all my chinese homeworks ...
maybe i will continue to be sick tomorrow idk my body too .
haha .
normally 7 wake up ,
i feeel soooo lethargic .
but today idk why .
8pm wake up ,
i feel extremely refreshed :D
i am up on task again (:

kaichong xD


th reason i love you is not for just that 3 words.
i'm strong and fine now after a day .
thanks everyone .
especially you ,
xoxo .

♥ 11:28 PM

[day 3]
ohno its late.
not really.
i am just beat after a whole day.
today my great grandmother is cremated..
and i am in school for NDP ..
does that makes me a sinner ?
i'm sorry ,
but all is useless now,
i cant reverse time.
but i need to carry on life,
my mum cried quite badly,
which makes my heart really heavy,
really can't concentrate during lessons whenever,
i thought of her face filled with tears .
i would use my hands to wipe it off for her ,
and tell her not to cry ,
it isn't anyone's fault ,
my greatgrandmother's getting old...
argh..
i am really getting to tired. D:

school was alright .
morning i did silent reading .
hard to find articles of pollution
but managed to find one with the help of iskandar.
after silent reading is maths.
was really tired because of yesterday ..
but i braced on ,
i tried to listen ..
kinda flunkked in my trigo .
made me more tired .
after maths is chemistry ..
and titration again ..
haiz ..
got the bes titration results quite far from ms wong ..
dosen't matter really too .
i don't know why i feel that way too .
recess i just sat there .
blank-minded .
staring into space .
drew what i wanted to draw .
POA next ...
too boring ..
then its chinese .
i forgot to bring my whole chinese worksheets and file
teacher let me off ..
not even 5 mins after school ..
i got pulled to NDP parade ..
marched quite abit and they called it a day.
heard from others that on wednesday when i'm in funeral ..
the GOH contigent was treated like dogs..
haiz .
Drawing can really show what's a mind is thinking .
i really love drawing different hairstyles.
drawing can help me ease time too .
and can help in not letting me fall asleep .
but still .
i'm tired .
hahas .
i'll try .
i will ..
to stay awake .

my heart's always there for you ,
no matter when my physical is beside you or not .
i'll never stop being there for you ,
neither will i go away ,
i'm sorry if i make you feel angry or sad sometimes .
but ,
iloveyou ♥

♥ 5:17 AM

nice michael jackson movie in collision with pokemon (:

♥ 3:23 AM

SO.
today is DAY 2.
3 more days to go ._.
i am in a funeral right now so i need to finish this thing fast ..
sorry teacher.

alright today ..
i woke up feeling tired.
i reached school feeling dead.
inside out.
i think i am worn out from school.
sat beside samuel and taught him abit of maths.
i forgotten quite alot myself.
then it was H'cube period.
aiyah too boring to worth mentioning ._.
then english.
do the comprehenshion.
managed to finished in time and hand up to Mr yao.
later i bring home then gone missing then you going to call my name in class again ._.
then it was maths.
aiyah got suprise maths test den i forgotten quite alot like i said..
next biology woots teacher never come ,
so sleep in class to preserve energy..
then recess.
went to see people play chess...
then humanities my teacher Mr Lim also never come.
but my stupid gastrics come O_O'''
i really cant take it so i tried to at least close my eyes as teacher say do your own things.
then really cant lerhs go lend panadol from someone .
thanks :D
morning i forget to eat my own medicine ...
aiyahs anyway now also no more lerh :D
Then POA .
TEACHER NEVER COME AGAIN .
lol.
so the sub teacher teach lorhs .
aiyah after a long day so tired plus somemore still abit gastrics so half asleep through lesson.
then after school.
got NDP training but i din't go .
i can't go .
i got funeral to attend .
lolls...
then i went home and changed my clothes and..
i went to TiongBahru.
it was SO far away from sembawang ._.
sleep throughout the train.
too dead from mornining till then.
even till now i don't feel like talking .
idk why .
just dont feel like really talk .
lolls.

kaichong (:



i will be there for you.
i just dont feel like talking
maybe its about ytd .
maybe its about today .
maybe its the future .
love may be a hard word to use
but for you ,
i am able to commit .
<3

♥ 7:30 AM

... i shall do my english online blogging on my blog bahs .
Day 1 -

today is a quite a bad day.i woke up late as i slept late.then at 7pm there is a meeting for npcc secondary 3 to go but i didn't attend.i was too tired then.i really couldn't wake up.everyday also has a bad headache.School was as boring as usual.PE wasn't any fun.i couldn't laugh like normal although i wanted too.English was quite alright.Recess i went to play basketball.i don't know but sweat quite alot.Lessons after recess are chemistry,Maths and Biology.We did chemistry speed tests.Maths we covered 7.5 on Cosin.Biology we did the food practical that tests whether different types of food include different types of things like protein and so on.after school,i sit down in the school canteen for awhile.played basketball at around 4pm.was really tired than but...nevermind i just go on bahs.played for quite long like till 8pm plus.i was sitting 962 back home when i found out i am really very tired already.When i reached home,i used computer which is quite obvious and i watched youtube because i don't feel like playing any games.

i'm really on quite a loss i think .
sometimes i don't know what i'm thinking either .
in the past its been like that .
the current me it still remains in me.
who am i and what have i been doing all this while.
sometimes,
i really hoped that once i sleep ,
i will never wake up anymore.
i don't belong to this world anymore.
what's wrong with me for people just joking with me,
why do i get so hot-tempered.
why am i doing all this.
i don't know.
i don't know what am i leading my life for .
what's so good about having everyone with me,
what's so bad about having everyone with me.
damn .
it seriously is irony enough.
i love you ,
i do ,
since you said i didn't treasure you ,
let me treasure you now .


once , a fish told the sea ; " You can't feel my tears when i am crying because you dont understand me ."
The sea told the fish ;"i can , because you have always been in my heart".

yeah thats all .

♥ 6:39 AM