hmm currently ii am thinking lots about the past more often den de old me.i wonder to myself hw many times i really changed among the times from sec1 - sec3. just a short 2 yrs i have changed so much.so many experiences and incidents made my thinking grew deeper although i dun show it.deep in my heart,i noe i brushed through many important ppl and things around me during those yrs.due to my lack of confidence have caused me so much in my life.my confidence can nvr be built up.just like tht time i was surprised to take the whole parade during the starting of the cca man i kinda flunked but wen everyone was saying i done well man ... i kinda hate myself dat time...i had so much mixed feelings tht time...my confidence also flunking but man thts a nice experience.my experience with so many diff types of ppl i met all along in my school life.man.i met dumb ppl like kevin,clumsy ppl like chunyong,tiko sekeng,retarded kiwi so on and so forth.hahs.i am actually lieing to myself by saying those.i noe deep tht we all got our own potential.but i cant find mine.lols.maybe i shud just stay being jack of most trades bahs.i always lied to myself dat i did my best well i didnt really noe actually.i doubt myself sometimes.maybe ii shud learn to be like antony.he dares speaks up although he is emotional.man no one is perfect just like kevin hu is not really clever but is made back by his hardworkingness.hw i hope i have just half of his dilligence towards life.everone around me.have their own aims and ambitions.i really dosent have one.i really dosent have any motivations except one last one...but...hahas i guess she will soon be gone after some time bahs.hahas.afterall hu i thk i am tht will make her remember of me.hmm remind her of i am a useless person?hahas.i just try to be a person and be more hardworking bahs.so hard.cos tht really is not character.maybe.i shud just try to overcome my confidence bahs.so many thngs i really missed in life due to my weaknesses.i must do it but ... i was say nvr do de.i am tht useless.thts me bahs i guess...someone useless.hahas.wad ambition ii am aiming for?i really dunno also.maybe ii am the fool among all afterall.how time flies.hahas.everyone beside me is changing rapidly.so fast tht now even my dearest person is away from me lerhs.mabe i shud really work hard afterall.i really missed her smthimes but..hahas.couldnt change a thing.maybe tht's hw worthless i'm.no matter hw hard everything will just be within my grasp,yet so far.

♥ 7:08 AM